
Parenting consciously is just plain hard work! The journey is as much about the children as the parent. I have grown and learned so much about myself as I have ventured down this path of gentle parenting. But as difficult as it is to look at the ways I could be more gentle with my children, it is even more challenging to find ways to be gentle with myself.
As I continue pushing my edges and expanding myself and trying to improve, I often feel like I’m failing. Change is not easy. And this path of mindful parenting is a long journey towards real and sustainable change. Self-compassion is what is needed in the face of it all. Just as I want my children to feel understood and held in their moments of regret, I also need to be gentle with myself when I mess up. There are ways to own our mistakes, realizing them for what they are, doing what we can to rectify them, and releasing them.
Modelling for my children what to do when I do mess up is showing them how to be in the world. In reality, I’m providing my children with the best possible teaching about what to do when we mess up; we do our best to make it right and try for change again tomorrow. What more could I hope to teach my children? No one is perfect…let’s stop pretending it’s possible.
Yes! I tell myself this every time I mess up. My kids need to see how to make a mistake, make amends, and move forward.
Thanks Tara. Sounds like you’re on top of it! I usually clue in after a good self-defeating blast from my inner critic 😉